Fix Your Hearts or Die

Does everyone want a little fascism as a treat?

Frenemy of the mag Brock Colyar wrote a party report from the inauguration about the “cultural ascendancy” of the “new” “young” conservatism. The takeaway is that young people are going MAGA because they want to say slurs and abandon woke culture. Colyar’s piece flirts with the argument made by one of the conservative influencers they traipse around the parties with: “Conservatives used to be uptight, but the left has become the funless, sexless party…What does a conservative even look like anymore?” They seem to look like influencers with ironic politics somewhere to the right of Geert Wilders. The word “fascist” does not appear in the article.

At the end of the piece, Colyar admits, “It’s true that over the past few months since Trump was reelected, I had begun to feel these young conservatives’ influence seeping into my own polite circles like The Substance.” (That’s not what the substance does, but never mind.) “We no longer had any patience for the identity warriors on our timelines… I was unleashed: the R-word, fat jokes.” And why not? “It felt freeing, empowering, though perhaps in the same way that bullying someone does when you’re in middle school.”

I’ve noticed lately that more people are wanting a little fascism, as a treat. I’ve noticed it when people roll their eyes at land acknowledgements or mask protocols, and I noticed who was sharing the solo poly hijabi amputee meme. But I have the same thing to say here as I do to the straight guy at the bar who’s over-excited to sing that one line in “Fairytale of New York,” or the leftist who excuses their use of the R-slur out of supposed ‘90s nostalgia or because they are “from New England.” Knock it off, knuckleheads, and wise up. If you whiners want your precious F-slurs and T-slurs and R-slurs, know that you’re laying the groundwork for people who are going to do a lot more harm than saying some mean words.

I reject the assumption that, deep down, we’re all a little reactionary. Not all of us feel constrained by caring about another human being, or at the very least, acknowledging that other people are people. As the dearly departed David Lynch said, fix your hearts or die.

Like everyone, I’ve been rewatching Twin Peaks. One scene in particular, I had to watch again and again. Impatient asshole FBI agent Albert Rosenfeld insults Sheriff Harry Truman, but when Truman gets in his face, Albert surprises him: “Now you listen to me. While I will admit to a certain cynicism, the fact is that I am a naysayer and hatchetman in the fight against violence. I pride myself in taking a punch, and I’ll gladly take another because I choose to live my life in the company of Gandhi and King. My concerns are global. I reject absolutely revenge, aggression, and retaliation. The foundation of such a method… is love. I love you, Sheriff Truman.”

The absurdity of an FBI agent living in the company of King aside, it’s the first time Albert sounds powerful rather than petty – even cool? There’s none of this strong love on the right, no connection to the many who stand together against the few. Their harshly lit parties will never be the counter culture, just packs of running dogs eating scraps from the President’s table. I’ll be outside the party, with the naysayers and hatchetmen in the fight against violence.

—Natalie Adler